Darling you send me..

Thursday, March 29, 2007

More puns!

* I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

* Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was - resisting a rest.

* Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He's all right now.

*The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.

* To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

* When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

* The short fortune teller who escaped from prison - was a small medium at large.

* A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

* A thief fell in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.

* When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.

* The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

* A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

* What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway)

* A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

* Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

* A backward poet writes inverse.

* A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

* With each marriage she got a new name and a dress.

* Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft ... and I'll show you A-flat miner.

* When a clock is really hungry it goes back four seconds.

* You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

* A boiled egg is hard to beat.

* When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

* Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.


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